for now, anyway. Just some final tallies that I’ve been meaning to post for a while. Read the rest of this entry »

Is a total trip. Today Val, one of the teachers, tried teaching the kids about telling jokes. She gave them some guidelines about what makes jokes funny, how to tell them, etc. Of course, it didn’t really sink in, and we had lots of kids making up jokes like: “Knock knock, Who’s there? Knock knock, Knock knock who? No, I was knocking on my head!” Which is funny mostly because of the enthusiaim they put into it. Then we told the kids some jokes, and one kid kept not getting them. I know this, because he kept saying “I don’t get it,” and looking very concerned. Until finally either one sank in or was explained to him, and he stood up, arms raised, like he was gonna testify to the lord, and yelled “I get it!” Read the rest of this entry »

In the hours I spend surfing the internet rather than working, I stumbled upon this really amusing collection of wrong answers.

http://www.scribd.com/doc/5107/They-didnt-study

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A character study of sorts.

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“It’s excruciatingly painful being green…”

who knew?

www.sadkermit.com

story by kids I work with. This time it’s by some 2nd and 3rd graders. And as with last time, I have only done some smoothing of edges.

There once lived a man named Bob who lived in Ye Olde Town of Medfield. He was a hobo, and would wander the town looking for work. Sometimes he found small jobs to do, but he never had enough work to have a place to stay. One day, as he was walking around, he noticed something odd. There was a mouse on the corner, and it was singing! Bob stopped, amazed. Read the rest of this entry »

Things you should not give a temp:

• Your credit card number, expiration and security code
• A month worth of unendorsed checks and cash
• Permission to take these off the premises and to the bank for deposit
• A key to the office
• Unlimited internet, and very little to do
• Authorization to order any and all supplies
• Access to non-inventoried and sometimes expensive office supplies
• Access to several members credit card information
• Your ssn and mother’s maiden name
• A postage meter

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I was on the train this morning and I was reading an article about how beef tastes different depending on where a cow lives and what they eat. I then looked at the picture of the cow and read the description of the picture. I had my headphones on so when i laughed out loud it must have been really loud because everyone on the train was looking at me.

So it’s not entirely cheese related. It’s also not entirely mine. It was mostly written by some kindergarteners I work with at MAP (Medfield Afterschool Program). I just sort of filled in the edges. Enjoy.

Once upon a time, there was a MAP site on the side of a volcano where the kids would come to play. There were four teachers working there, Zack, Emily, Tara, and Michaela. The kids had a lot of fun, playing games, singing songs, and doing projects. It was a really happy place for everyone.
One day, Chicken Pock, one of the children, heard a rumbling from deep in the volcano. He tried to warn the teachers, but he didn’t have time. The volcano erupted, and the MAP building went flying up in the air. Everyone was scared at first, but it landed safely in the water by the edge of the volcano. Then everyone noticed that Michaela was not in the building. In fact, she had been thrown out into the air when the volcano erupted. Fortunately, there was a kite flying by, and she grabbed it and sailed back down. But when she got to the MAP building, she stubbed her toe on the wall. Just then a snowman was walking along and saw her hurt toe. He gave her a band-aid, and then started to dance. She was so amused by this that she decided to dance with him.
Right about the same time, a frog was coming out of the ocean. He was hungry, so he looked around for some food. He looked up and down and all around, then saw the sun shining up in the sky. Mmm, that looks good, he thought, and jumped up to eat it. Of course, it was too hot to eat, so he spit it out and jumped back in the water and had a big drink to cool his throat. Then he thought of the moon, which he knew was made of green cheese. So he jumped up and ate the moon. It was delicious, and his color changed from red to green. Then he jumped back down to take a nap next to the volcano.
After a while, a squirrel came sniffing along and saw the frog. The squirrel was hungry too, and swallowed the frog up in one big gulp! Then the squirrel lay down to take a nap right in the same spot. Well, wouldn’t you know it, along came a fox, also looking for food! When the fox saw the squirrel, she went over and gobbled it up in one gulp. This finally woke up the frog, who was stuck in the squirrel’s belly. He got out his walkie-talkie, called the squirrel and said “Let me out of here!” Of course, the squirrel was stuck in the fox’s belly, so the squirrel had to call up the fox on the walkie-talkie. “Let me out of here!” said the squirrel. So the fox coughed up the squirrel, and the squirrel coughed up the frog. The frog landed in the volcano, which was so hot, it turned him red again. He hopped out into the water to cool off, then hopped away.
Meanwhile, the kids at MAP had decided they liked the building being in the water. From that day on, the kids would go swimming whenever they were at MAP.

Oh stinky comestible
how I love you so
you make my heart so big
and my breath, like whoa.

I love you when you come from Spain
I love you most from France
I think I love you so much that
I’d wear you as underpants.

Oh my old milk
you curdle up so well
I think I’ll marry you one day
and forever we will smell…